hope

Literally had the biggest freak out moment last night. Well, me and Peter stayed up watching films till 1am, and then he went to sleep, so I stayed downstairs tidied up, had a ciggie and i was gone. I couldn't fall asleep so I kept twitching and turning in my bed. And then. Suddenly, as I turned form lying on my back to my left side, I felt this little lump go from my right armpit down right into my.. breast. I was trying to find the lump then but I couldn't. Anyway it hurt as well. What the fuck? I actually started crying, that freaked me out so much. I ran downstairs to get my laptop and stayed up till 3am googling breast cancer early signs and symptoms. I had that lump there before, a couple of months ago and it hurt a lot, but i didn't see a doctor or anything. Apparently there is only a 0.5% chance of getting a breast cancer under the age of 20, but I matched two symptoms.  Plus I don't know it this one's a symptom but it said 'loss of appetite &weight loss' and my mum commented yesterday that I look like I've lost weight in the last week. I don't know is thats because I didn't eat much at the festival or because its a symptom? Well, I woke up at 11 this morning which was too late to book a doctors appointment, so I guess I'll just do it one Monday.

On a more positive note, It's 4pm, and I woke up at 2. 2!!!! What? I usually wake up around 10, no matter what time I go to bed. So yeah, this day has been running. I'm just in bed reading right now. Also, my hair is dip dyed a light lavender colour. And my fringe. 
God, i really need to do something! I'm running out of things to do in this house. I might go volunteering tomorrow.
Oh also also... Can you SMELL the autumn?! It's amazing, I can smell it and feel it and it's getting colder! I'm so happy, I don't like summer very much, it's boring and hot. 
I forgot to mention anything on my blog about my A level results! They're okay, I got BCBB! Film, Media and Photography are B's and Art is a C. I'm quite happy, but I am SO pushing myself in photography this year. Watch me.

And While I'm at it, I'll post some photos form the band shoot a did a little while ago and also Louise's shoot. 

Purple Fringe, Go Me

HAHA, yey I dyed my fringe purple <3

And I was a bit bored just now so I decided to give my fringe a little cute, because firstly, it was a bit dead, and split and all that. Secondly, it was too long and puffy, I gotta admit, I didn't look right. And I am sorry, I just took these photos after a shower and with no make up on so I don't look very pretty *laughs* Also I apologise that I look so weird in them, I can't help it! I just can't look at a web cam with a straight face. :3
Hmmm. I think I'll put up my other photographs tomorrow (not the web cam ones, the ones from school) because I don't like loading my blog full of photographs on the same day.
Anyway. Today was really really cold, and I froze, not nice. I got off at Tesco to get my tobacco and for the first time ever I didn't get served in St Mellon's! I was really pissed off, pardon me, but I was late for my lesson, I was freezing, I didn't get my tobacco and it started hailing- I was not happy. It was so nice though, apart from the cold. It was really dark outside and at 9am it felt like 5pm, which if you hadn't noticed is really dark!
I was a bit late for my film class, but because it's the last session with Dave, he let us watch a film. So yes, we watched Submarine. It is beautiful, you should really watch it. It is a Welsh film (proud) and its been filmed Penarth which technically is in Cardiff, and Swansea. Anyway, it was a really low budget film, but I think it was magic. The cinematography of it is brilliant. Oh fuck, pins and needles in my left leg OUCH. Literally can't move it.. Aw whatever, I'll just leave it for a minute.
We finished out class an hour early so me and my friend Matt, went to AJ's and got ourselves a hot chocolate, yum. We chilled there for a bit and Pippa joined us at twelve. I was third wheeled again. I always hang with them in AJ's, so I don't feel the awkwardness of the two of them making sexual jokes and kissing, haha. 
So then after two nice hours sat at AJs I went to my media class and I was just basically filling up myself with tons of free chocolate that Naomi (out media teacher) brought us. After 20 minutes she let us go and gave us homework to do over half term, year so basically 2 magazine covers. And A storyboard fro Film, I forgot to mention.
Awhhh, I'm craving a cigarette, so goodnight. :p

can you guide me all the way

Sveiki, ajjaa jajjaa


 Labi, man ir divi jaunumi: viens ir vienkasribriniskigiprartamneaptverami jauks un otrs ir.. nuuu Just Makes Me Happy, hehe : D
Alrightt es saksu ar otro: Skolaa mani parcela no pasas zemakas grupas (kuraa ir cilveki ar anglu valo. problemam, kuras man nekad nebija, vienkarsi ielika tur uz gadu ja tas bija pirmais gads uk,) uz pasu pasu augsu. Un es itkaa isti nesparotu kaa, man likas ka bija nosakuma jaiet uz vedeejo, lai tiktu pasaa augsaa. Bet anywayys. Manaa klasee iet tas zens kas man kind of patiik. Aprakstisu: Loti gars, es vinam man liekas varetu but lidz pleciem, ;D vinam ir cirkaini mati, vinam ir gitarstunda tiesi pimas manas skolaa.
Pirmais jaunums kas ir vienkarsi wonnderful: Es iemacijos taisit matus ta lai vini ilgi staav kupli. Un uz ilgu. Tatad mans nosleepums: uzkasi pa MAZAI skipsnai un iepuut laku un tad ta kadas 20 reizes. Ahh cik iedarbigi, es to izdariju pirms kadam 4 stundam un veljoprojam kupli.
...Ko te vel par manu dzivi. nekoo, laikam. Ritdien iesu uz 6th Form Tetster Day, kas sakas plkst. 09.30 un beidzas 15.00 kaa skolas diena. Prieks kam tik agri, man bus jacelas ka vienmer 7. Aa, tiem kas nezin un ta laikam ir lielaka dala: 6th Form ir taspats kas koledza tikai Skolaa, ko es nekada gadijumaa neizvelesos, nekada gadijuma sigada beigas pabeigsu skolu un uzreiz projaam, kautvai uz koledzu. xD Gandriz visa Gada grupa (year11) ies, un pec tam gandriz visi ies uz kiino, skattities jauno Hariju Potteru, Es ari domaju par iesanu, bet godiigi: es neesmu parliecinaata jo iepriekseja reize man filmas vidu prasija vai man neesot aizdegusies mati, wtf?

Nedelas dziesma: Confide-This I believe,
Man drosviendriz apniks confide un bus jamekle kautkas jauns, es visu laiku klausos vienu un to pasu lidz man apniik,, un tad pareju uz kautko citu lidz man atkal tas apniik un tad atgriezos pie same old. same oldd ;DD
x